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Did you hear the one about the diminutive individual who took a jackass and a honeycomb into a brothel?
Stop me if you’ve heard this, but he generally demanded answers on how in seven hells the internet would reconcile itself with whatever in tarnation that was which aired in the spot of the Game Of Thrones finale this last weekend.
Just for the record, I just consumed a Lunchable for dinner this evening which sported an April 12th expiration date on it. That’s right people. I made and expired Lunchable a Dinnerable.
Now let’s get back at it.
For those of you who:
- Haven’t seen the episode but are planning to watch it
- Aren’t familiar with the show
- Couldn’t really give a flying rats ass about the cultural miasma that society has been enveloped in for the last six weeks
I, TharpSter, First in His Name, Exploiter of the Deliberate Malaprop and the Oxford Comma, Curator of The Pit Bull Diaries, Purveyor of Standard Time, and Provider of Verbal Brilliance for an Otherwise Dull Internet, with every ounce of power I wield, excuse you from reading any further into this post. Feel free to wander around the site here and find something else to read.
You’ve been admonished accordingly.
Soup to nuts, Game Of Thrones is a culmination of everything that popular culture loves about dragons, dwarves, zombies, incest, subscription service level nudity, and source material for brutal memes shared on a vast collection of computers and servers networked together for the purpose of enhancing communication.
Quick side note, the subscription service level nudity never provided us a shot of Peter Dicklage, however the last boob it showed us belonged to a character we met 8 seasons ago when she was about 12.
And you thought the incest was cringeworthy.
The show aired it’s finale this last weekend in a manner which the internet generally hated. Brandon Stark became the king, Tony Stark was killed off by performing a snapture against Thanos, Jon Snow was sent back to the great wall to guard the north from residentially flexible migrants bent on dictating the Westerosian immigration policy, and Sansa Stark resumed her role as the Dark Phoenix in what could be yet another big screen adaptation of Whiskey Tango Foxtrot.
Now that I’ve laid down the groundwork, I’ll say this.
I’m not going to sit here and rant about what they shoulda done, what they did wrong, and what they coulda done.
There have been plenty of popular TV shows (and movies for that matter) over the years which have had finales which didn’t live up to the quality of the show itself.
Don’t even get me started on how Leave It To Beaver wrapped up.
None the less, consider this.
In the age of the internet where everyone has a voice to express whatever fleeting thought that passes in the vast expanse between their ears with the speed of a frog in a blender, people are going to bitch, gripe, and moan about anything and everything.
Yay, internet!
Whereas I have and continue to watch my share of TV and movies, I’m going to opt out of burning calories on Blogging America Great with complaints about that particular subject matter. I’ve got plenty of material from direct marketing campaigns and daylight savings time to bitch about if I really want to spend my time complaining.
So did you hear the one about the diminutive individual who took a jackass and a honeycomb into a brothel?
Yeah, I did.
It built an awesome world with an interesting backstory. It had some good character development and really kept us all on the edge of our seats in panty-soaked anticipation of what would come next.
Sadly, the punchline wasn’t very good.
Fox News is the BEST show on TV. No script, no cutting rooms, no do overs, no editing–nobody can write better thrill binding stuff!!! There will be, without a doubt, a future TV mini series–better than LOST or Roots.