“Outta my way world. I’ve got job aids, procedure documents, and checklists to create. I may even opt for the Mountain Dew over green tea.”

That’s the update I dispatched to Facebook this morning while dining on a bowl of butter and sugar flavored with a hint of Malt-O-Meal. The entire morning has been somewhat disjointed for me to say the least. From the point I woke up (if I actually did), to the shower and getting dressed, to the moment I sit here typing my perpetual babble for the web, I’ve had the distinct impression that I’ve been smack dab in the middle of an out of body experience.

For the record, I opted against the Mountain Dew and went with my common standby this morning. It’s not that I don’t like Mountain Dew or anything. It’s just that the citrus and caffeine content of this beloved nectar throw my bladder into a Tourette’s-like fit which sends me to the restroom where I have to observe urinal etiquette every 30 minutes with the sensation that there is a S.W.A.T. team on the inside preparing to make a forced exit with the ambitious assistance of a battering ram. I’m probably at the right age to do so, however I’d rather not put on public display any symptoms which are commonly associated with an enlarged prostrate. People will talk.

I guess I’ll get back to my job aids, procedure documents and checklists now.