News Worthy of a Spit Take

You’ll have to excuse me a moment whilst I dig out a tissue to wipe off my monitor.  I’m afraid I just ran across an interesting article out on the vast plains of the internet, and encountered a serious accounting of the ongoing debate over the proposed plan for the government to provide universal healthcare to a whole gaggle of Americans.  In the process of reading the article, I found several statements in the article to be quite amusing.  Sadly, the waves of mirth came over me right at a time when I had taken a cold refreshing slug of Lipton’s Diet Green Tea (citrus).

Needless to say, even though this gem of a product from the good people at Lipton is thin and easy to slam, it doesn’t stay in your mouth when you let out a heartfelt guffaw at the mere suggestion that the proponents of suggested takeover (i.e.: the President and Congress) of the healthcare industry needs bipartisan support to get this year’s big ugly signed into law.  Sadly, my HP w1907 monitor fell victim to its wide screen features by receiving a majority of my primary source for anti-oxidants.  All things being equal, you should not really make it a practice to go from bottle to mouth to monitor.  It’s bad form.

In an article published on The Washington Examiner website tonight, members of the AP shed a glaring light on one of the problems with the current healthcare debate.  Analysis:  Liberals say ‘no more compromise,’ call for end to one-sided health care negotiation is chalk full with statements that will elevate the likes of authors Charles Babington and Ricardo Alonso-Zaldivar to the rank of Captain in the field of the obvious.

Various statements throughout the article indicate that the DNC in Congress is growing tired and weary of trying to negotiate with members of the GOP on the healthcare issue.   They’re saying it’s time to move on without the GOP.  The article even claims that unity within the DNC is being tested by the ongoing outreach to the Republicans.

If you’ve ever read the playbook of the DNC, you’ll understand why this stuff is so funny.  First of all, whenever it comes to negotiating an issue in Congress, it’s always been the GOP that had to sacrifice their ideologies at the altar of compromise and step across the aisle to join the DNC.  For the tables to be turned and the universal healthcare proponents to feel like they have to step across the aisle is nothing short of hilarious.

What’s even funnier is the mere, unmistakable fact that the Democrats don’t even have to compromise with the GOP on this issue.  The GOP does not have the numbers in the House, or the Senate to Kill Bill with the Five Point Palm Exploding Heart Technique.  They could stay at home and take part in whatever stereotypical behavior Republicans do, like beating their spouse, perpetuating slavery, evicting the working poor, and stimulating the economy at the local topless bar.

With that, I offer the following tidbits to the savants who feel the Republicans in Congress are really the ones holding up the healthcare legislation. If the Democrats in Congress feel that strongly about the benefits of a universal healthcare bill, they can pass it.  If they feel it will really lower costs, they have the votes to get it through.  If the bill is slated to be a sure fire success and the paradigm of all universal healthcare plans for generations to come, then they have what they need to make it law.  They don’t need Republican number one to get it through.

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