Monday May 21st 2012

‘News Updates’ Archives

“One Simple Sign-on” Listed As A Possible 2nd Term Initiative

“One Simple Sign-on” Listed As A Possible 2nd Term Initiative

WASHINGTON, D.C. – The Obama Administration is considering the use of individual mandates in future legislative proposals if the President should win re-election this year.  One of the first proposals would require all American citizens to register a profile on a [Read More]

Obesity On The Rise

Obesity On The Rise

Throughout the day I listen to talk radio whenever I have the opportunity.  At several times during the day when I listen in, the local news manages to infiltrate it’s way into my day in order to discard it’s tidbits of useless information into my skull.  By [Read More]

Aliens Use Nationwide EAS Test To Launch Attack

Aliens Use Nationwide EAS Test To Launch Attack

Washington, D.C. – In a surprise turn of events, aliens from the delta quadrant launched an attack on America today from orbit just over Washington DC.  The attack happened at precisely 2pm eastern time. At the time of this writing, cities scattered all over the [Read More]

Wyoming Heritage In Jeopardy Over Interstate Rest Stop Incident

Wyoming Heritage In Jeopardy Over Interstate Rest Stop Incident

Glenrock, Wy - An incident which can only be characterized as unusual took place last month at the Edgar J. Herschler Memorial Rest Stop just outside of Glenrock on the northbound side of Interstate 25. According to documents obtained from the Wyoming Department of [Read More]

The Royal Scar!

The Royal Scar!

  Note from the desk of TharpSter:  Quite often, friends, acquaintances, and frenemies alike launch peppered assaults at yours truly with all sorts of ideas of what I should write about.  To this point, I have yet to successfully act on the suggestion, because my ego [Read More]

New Trend In 2012 Vacation Requests Cause Concern

New Trend In 2012 Vacation Requests Cause Concern

Washington, D.C. – Vacation requests submitted to employers nationwide for the calendar year 2012 are showing a new trend compared to previous years’ requests. According to a statistics recently released by the Department Of Labor, more of the workforce is [Read More]

Protest Delays Debate

Protest Delays Debate

ORLANDO – Last night’s debate among the Republican presidential candidates was delayed briefly as a result of a protest staged by proponents in favor of federal benefit extensions for the perpetually unemployed who choose to stay that way. As the candidates took [Read More]

Texas To Name Official State Font

Texas To Name Official State Font

AUSTIN – In an effort to present a more friendly mentality about the state of Texas, a bill was presented before the state legislature this morning to change the font on all statewide signage.  If the bill should pass and subsequently be signed into law by Governor [Read More]

TSA’s Enhanced Pat-Down Encounters New Assault

TSA’s Enhanced Pat-Down Encounters New Assault

  DENVER – The Transportation Security Administration came under fire this afternoon when an agent became the victim of an unexpected response from a passenger who was undergoing a security screening.  Without any warning, the passenger broke wind in the face of the TSA [Read More]

The Mosque Pit

The Mosque Pit

There’s been a lot in the news lately about the possibility of a mosque being built a few blocks away from ground zero. The imam who is promoting the mosque appears to be pro Hamas, as he reportedly refuses to denounce the organization as one with terroristic [Read More]

Latest Topics

Initial Contact

Initial Contact

Speed things up.  Make them quicker.   That’s right people.  In today’s microwave society where we [Read More]

Questionable Parenting

Questionable Parenting

Remember Parenthood?   As much as you’d like to think that I’m talking about the Ron Howard movie that [Read More]

Your Friday….

Your Friday….

….my Thursday.   That’s right people.  By the time you read this dispatch, I will be firmly [Read More]

Not Quite The Horse Head

Not Quite The Horse Head

How do you know when you’re going to have a bad day?   When you open your oven to check dinner, the rump [Read More]

The Last Gig

The Last Gig

Last night, I attended what will most likely be the last concert of my son’s high school career.   I [Read More]

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Mom had this to say

Great job! Wish I could have been there! Read the post

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Viciously Sweet had this to say

I have already seen some silly Photoshops of those pictures. The internet moves quickly! Also I'm ready for the next Read the post

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joe had this to say

you are the asshole customer that every single person in this business hates! Get over yourself and please go to red Read the post

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Mom had this to say

:-). Thanks for being who you are! I couldn't have done it without you! Read the post

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CFO had this to say

*BELCH* lol Read the post